You bet your bottom dollar I am!
First of all - Merry Christmas! I am writing this from sunny Southern Spain where I am spending the festive season, and it is rather lovely. I had forgotten what blue sky looked like and let me tell you now, blue sky is MARVELLOUS.
Anyway, please allow me the indulgence to do a self-congratulatory round-up of the year. Because this year has been hard! When I look back to my mental health state this time last year, and at the start of 2023, I can hardly recognise myself. To be ending this year proud of my work, proud of myself, and excited for 2024, is a big deal.
In March 2023, I returned to freelancing after two years working as a staffer on an indy paper. Going back to freelancing is always a risk, the endless hustle of pitching and peacocking for commissions, applying for grant funding, balancing journalism work with copywriting work with book work with events work… but returning to freelancing also gave me, well, freedom. It was scary, I am not going to lie. But I rediscovered the drive, self-confidence, determination and skills that had helped me forge a successful freelance career in 2017, and which has made – dare I say it – 2023 even better than back then.
Of course, making a success of freelancing is dependent on building strong relationships and I am so grateful to the brilliant editors who commission my work, the writers and art directors I get to work with, and the friends who are also collaborators, cheerleaders, people to bounce ideas with, and, at the end of the day, just awesome kind funny supportive friends.
2023 was, of course, also the year I went to Ukraine to report on Russia’s full-scale invasion of the country. This was a profoundly challenging experience and I am not embarrassed to say that during the first trip, I struggled with anxiety and fear and, after the second trip, a few post-trauma symptoms. At the same time, reporting from Ukraine was an immense privilege. I feel so privileged that so many people trusted me with their stories, and I am so grateful to everyone who spoke to me, who shared their experiences of war, bereavement, reporting, the front line, torture, displacement, mental health, and fighting.
Ukraine so overshadowed everything else about 2023 that sometimes I forget that it was also the year my book came out! So that was also a hell of a journey, and I am so proud of the book, its research, and what it tells us about how the hell we got here.
It is impossible to choose my ‘favourite’ articles from 2023, but here are a selection of some that I am most proud of.
For the Observer
Dozens of UK police officers disciplined over sexual contact with crime victims and witnesses
Revealed: almost 1,000 rapes in prisons in England and Wales since 2010
‘We’ve come so far from saying women can’t play football’: girls gather to cheer on the Lionesses
Sexual harassment allegations cost local authorities at least £2.5m (with Sascha Lavin)
Animal refuges in Britain are ‘full to bursting’ as owners give up pets in cash crisis
For the i paper
Women and children can’t even swim without fear of assault – why aren’t they protected? (with Lauren Crosby-Medlicott)
'Russians came in a car marked with Z': Inside a Ukrainian city destroyed by war (probably the article I am most proud of, from the whole year)
Ukrainian couple find love during bombardment as they searched for nine missing cats
Family of Kenyan sex worker 'killed by British soldier' calls on King Charles to take action
For the Times
NHS pays millions to victims of hospital sex pests (with Sascha Lavin)
For openDemocracy
Staff at Home Office-funded hotel accused of ‘treating migrant like slave’ (with Sascha Lavin)
For The Lead UK
HOW DRAG QUEEN STORY HOUR PROTESTS BECAME THE HARD RIGHT’S GATEWAY DRUG
NO STONE UNTURNED: THE WOMEN INVESTIGATING RUSSIA'S WAR CRIMES
ASYLUM SEEKERS' ALLOWANCE CUT TO £1.25 A DAY
For the Ferret
How a community-run helpline is helping women access safe abortion advice in Kenya
Trafficking survivors: the Polish activists supporting Ukrainian women fleeing war horrors (thank you Karin Goodwin for choosing this as one of your reads of the year)
All of these articles were made possible thanks to the support and vision of my editors at each outlet, and also I want to say a big thank you to Sascha Lavin and Lauren Crosby-Medlicott for being ace collaborators, and to Anna Vlasenko for her friendship and support with the work from Ukraine. And of course to everyone I spoke to and who shared their stories, and trusted me with their experiences.
Obligatory book plug
Publishing your first book is a rollercoaster. There was a lot of chat this year about the ‘trauma’ of the debut book. Nothing deals with the anxiety of publication than going to a war-zone less than a month later…
I am as ever so grateful to my super agent Kate Johnson for her friendship, support and understanding, and to the team at Verso, especially Catherine Smiles. Thank you to everyone who bought the book and reviewed the book, and a special thank you to Andrew Kelly and Zoe Steadman-Milne at Bristol Ideas for supporting the launch.
What I loved
There’s only one story in town and it’s Michelle Mone. There are so many brilliant investigative journalists who have worked at different stages and in different ways on this story, and I want to credit my pals Iain Overton and Sam Bright who have been on this story for so long.
But for now I’ll share the Guardian’s Caroline Davies and David Conn, the latter of which has done such vital investigating and reporting into this scandal.
How the Michelle Mone scandal unfolded: £200m of PPE contracts, denials and a government lawsuit
Also a shout-out to the awesome Jenna Corderoy and Billy Stockwell for their investigation into university cash.
Revealed: £281m of secret cash poured into UK universities
What I’m reading
No ‘what I’m writing’ this week, there’s loads of links in this email already!
Currently re-reading Bleak House which I have not read since I was 19! Because Christmas requires a fat classic.
I’d never read Scoop by Evelyn Waugh, which is weird because I read a lot of Waugh when I was younger. It’s a great satire on journalism but the racist language is hard to deal with.
I loved LOVED Yellowface by R F Kuang, or did I say that last week?
And The Secret Hours might be my favourite Mick Herron so far.
What I’m watching
Last week I started The Gilded Age and binged the whole of the first series in three days (did I generally just skive off work last week? yeah maybe). Will Carrie Astor dance the quadrille unless Mrs Astor goes to the ball! I have to say, I hated Downton Abbey but I wonder if I am just a bit more carefree about the US class system? Of course, it’s no Edith Wharton. But I will watch Christine Baranski in anything.
Despite being a 1930s-1950s film fan I have never actually seen It’s A Wonderful Life so that was a treat to watch here in sunny Spain.
Last night we watched An Audience with Kylie and she is a dream, a star, my one true pop princess.
And that’s it! Merry Christmas to you all. Thank you for reading my SubStack, for sharing my work, and for helping to turn 2023 into a year I can truly celebrate.
Here’s some more of that blue sky.
You’ve certainly had one heck of a year Sian. I do a little happy dance every time I see your book in a shop. Have a well deserved break and see you soon x
Thank you lovely - and Merry Christmas xx